Uncensored Facebook...April

[Lily]

You don't have to leave her if you don't want to, Treeb! I trained Izbiz without ever leaving him to cry alone. Does she normally feed to sleep, or drop off in your arms? If she does, why not just stay beside her cot and talk to her or sing, so she's not on her own? Then you can gradually move away and stay quiet for longer periods of time, as she gets used to it.

[qbm]

I'm going on a course tomorrow at Edinburgh Uni and I've managed to leave everything I printed for it in my classroom along with my bloody diary. I also left my laptop there as it didn't specify to bring it but it turns out I got an email saying I should at 4:30. Approximately 4 min after I left school.

Ffs. I'm going to look so unprofessional rocking up with my blank notepad.

[EnigmaFish]

I don't know, I think you can get away with a notebook if you just act like it's completely normal...

[Treeb]

I know Lily, but I'm not sure that would work for us. Won't she just try to play with me and then eventually be crying and screaming and trying to climb out of the crib to get to me? She usually nurses to sleep. When I try to lay her in her bed awake she just instantly sits or stands up.

[Treeb]

Well that was basically a total useless disaster. Attempted leaving her in her bed twice but she was so upset I only left her for one minute each time, then she wouldn't let me put her down at all again and I had about half an hour of holding her and singing to her while she cried, intermittently nursing her (during which she still didn't calm down fully). After 30 or 40 minutes she was so worn out that I let her just nurse to sleep like she is used to.

After chatting with dh afterward we have realized that she is in a general period of separation anxiety anyway and has been getting upset even when I hand her off to Daddy, who she normally would be happy with. So now I'm second-guessing things and thinking maybe it's not the right time for this after all, but am I just making excuses? Will need to reevaluate and come up with a better plan for how to proceed.

[junglewonderland]

That sounds horrible, Treeb! You could start with your current routine and make really small changes at a time, like nurse til she's nearly asleep then put her down, gradually reducing the feeding time. Or some people find that using a totally different method to get them to sleep works, like rocking/putting in a baby carrier, to change the nursing/sleep association.

[Ali70]

Good luck Treeb, that sounds tough

I'm so proud of Sproglet. We've just had four of her friends round for her 3rd birthday party. She shared her things beautifully, coped well with a group of people which she sometimes struggles with and we all had an absolute ball. Such a lovely day

[Treeb]

Thanks Ali and jw. I think I'm going to have to go with the "change of method" plan, and try to get her to fall asleep in my arms but without nursing, and then eventually move on from there. In a way it feels counter-productive since it is just replacing one sleep association with another, but I think going straight to putting her into her bed is too big a change for her. She's been super clingy this morning and hardly let me put her down at all, and definitely will not let me out of her line if sight!

Happy birthday Sproglet! Glad the party was such a success!

[EnigmaFish]

Even if you decide not to use the method, it might be worth reading up on dr Jay Gordon's sleep training method. Newt reacted to sleep training in a very similar way to what you're describing, and that's what gave us the best results.

[Treeb]

Thanks EF, I'll look into it. Tonight was a bit better in that there was much less crying. I didn't try putting her in her bed at all until she was fully asleep, but she did accept more snuggling and singing to help her get sleepy vs. just comfort nursing until falling asleep. Would have been better if L hadn't come in and turned the light on just as she was closing her eyes! In the end she couldn't fully settle and we ended up nursing to sleep again.

[sabrina fair]

I appear to have developed a slightly obsessive crush on the actor Colin Morgan (from Merlin, Humans and the Fall, for those of you who understandably have never heard of him). I'm not sure where it's come from, but I've found myself searching out everything I can possibly watch that he's in, and hoping he'll appear in something at the theatre soon so I can go to see him. Censored because, well, it's embarrassing!

In other news, I love my DH for many reasons, but today it's been because he understands my excitement at turning green! He gets that this has been my safe place for the last 4.5 years.

[EnigmaFish]

I had to look him up on IMDb, I'll admit. Nothing to be ashamed of there, he looks like a nice fella (as Kleintje would say).
Delighted that your DH understands your excitement!

[sabrina fair]

[emzit]

Censored because talking about it isn't really the done thing... But we just had our house valued and they've given us a conservative estimate that is $100k higher than we bought it for 5.5 years ago! Another $50k on top of that is achievable! I'm shocked and woohoo at the same time!

[qbm]

That's fantastic emzit!!!