However, turning 40 feels solid and secure - I can concentrate on growing my family instead of wasting time wondering whether it would ever happen. That's not to say everything's rosy - my Dad has been diagnosed with prostate cancer alongside his skin cancer and diabetes, and it looks like my Mum's cancer has returned (will be confirmed with a CT scan in early Jan), but I feel stronger than ever to cope and support them in whatever's ahead. I've got a great bunch of mum friends in my village who organised a surprise pyjama party last night - sitting in my hastily opened Christmas pjs and slippers, drinking tea (and champagne) and eating cake until midnight, I felt far more relaxed and at ease than I ever did forcing myself to enjoy a night out on the town. Then today was a meal out with my lovely family of four, followed by the fire going on now, Colin Caterpillar cake being eaten and a bottle of Moët about to be cracked open...life is good!
