Sentences you never expect to hear

[bimbambaLINs]

Tammy's status on Facebook reminded me that I keep meaning to start this thread after overhearing DP saying to Snufflebum

"Stop throwing that onion at my head, it is plastic but it hurts"

I was PMSL for ages ... still makes me giggle.

What are your favourites?

[blossom]

M (after climbing over a PJ-clad DH this morning): "What was that I t ouched?"
DH: "nothing"
M: "what was it? I want to touch it again"
DH: "It was my willy and you can't touch it again."
M: "But I want to, I want to touch your willy."

Poor DH was so embarrassed he virtually needed counselling afterwards!

[TPM]

M (after climbing over a PJ-clad DH this morning): "What was that I t ouched?"
DH: "nothing"
M: "what was it? I want to touch it again"
DH: "It was my willy and you can't touch it again."
M: "But I want to, I want to touch your willy."

Poor DH was so embarrassed he virtually needed counselling afterwards!

LMAO Thank you blossom!!

[Morlyte]

Oh they are both hilarious!

I cant think of any at the moment, but I know we must have loads.

[samsmumlou]

Ha ha ha ha ha ha....

Provided much needed laugh - thank you!! Can't wait til Sam starts uttering such wonders

[AB&M]

Very funny!

Will have to remember Bruno's for tomorrow!

[weasley]

M (after climbing over a PJ-clad DH this morning): "What was that I t ouched?"
DH: "nothing"
M: "what was it? I want to touch it again"
DH: "It was my willy and you can't touch it again."
M: "But I want to, I want to touch your willy."

PMSL

"Harry, will you stop sweeping the cat, she trying to eat her dinner."

Harry: (holding my bra in his hands) bra?
Me: yes, bra.
Harry: Daddy's?

[Rahgamuffin]

I love these )

Benji is half talking, half signing at the moment which is hilarious - he can be signing one thing and saying another! This is one of my favourite 'things I never thought I'd hear' though:

Benji: 'Muuuuhma digger (a JCB type toy) biffffed (bashed into) (sign teddy bear) milkeee?'
Me 'You want milky?'
Benji 'No, Digger milkee'
Me 'Digger doesn't make milk'
Benji 'Digger neeeeeeeeed milkeeee'
Me 'Mummy doesn't give digger milky'
Benji (mournful voice) 'No? poor poor digger'

[PerpetualMadness]

Blossom - PMSL. We had a similar exchange when I was having a bath with him. He was sitting between my legs and pointed at my pubic hair:

P: 'What's that?'
Me: 'That's my pubic hair. You'll get some when you're bigger.'
P: 'I see what's in there?'
Me: 'Mummy's vulva and urethra are in there but you don't need to see.'
P: 'I do. I do need to see.'
Me: 'No you don't.'
P: 'Oh. I wash the hair?'

[kin_paniscus]

such classics

felix isn't at sentences, and about 2 1/2 years of xylia crazy sayings are trying to fight there way to the front... one or two will make it to the consious level of my thoughts sometime and i'll post them.

in the meantime, i'll have some good laughs

[Eli]

I love these thankyou for reminding me that our children really are adorable and hilarious (Munchkin seems not well and they've both resisted bedtime winding each other up)

Mine is something I never expected to say
"No Mr Man, lights are not for eating, come away from the light, the bulb is not edible!"

[TinLIN]

Oh Blossom, that's class!
I read it out to DP and he visibly winced and cringed at the prospect of a similar exchange happening here in the future...

[Svea]

'mama, you are fuzzy' (pointing at my pubic hair)
'papa has a sausage' (pointing at his manhood)

'baby boobs?'
'yes, those are mama's baby boobs.'
'let's see, shall we?' (as she cops a feel)

[becoming_mother]

Oh my. *giggling*

This is another "things I never thought I'd say" one. I've taken it verbatim from an instant message I sent a dear close friend the night it happened, because I think the tone of the message probably adds to the whole situation. I was feeling a bit put-upon at the time, if also amused.

*waves* *aggrieved* My son is experimenting with "this fits in that" and "this fits on that" concepts. Which explains how, tonight, I came to protest, "Hey! There's a goat on my nipple!" Yes, Drew. Yes, the little goat toy for your barn has a circular hole on the bottom. Yes, indeed, it does. Now, I thought you were nursing?

[worluce]

Daddy and Beany in the bath, discussion about boys and girls...
Daddy: Yes, Daddy has a penis, Beany has a penis, men and boys have penises... does Mammy have a penis?
Beany: No
Daddy: What do ladies have?
Beany: (thoughtful pause) Handbags!

Also liked Beany's response to his Grandad...
Grandad: Would you like to sit on the Shay Lonj?
Beany: (disdainful look and voice) It's Chaise Longue Grandad, from John Lewis!