abandoning the highchair

Oh, we're done with all that vegetable-steaming and mess, our children are cutlery-wielding, spaghetti-chomping angels... at least some of the time.

abandoning the highchair

Postby Sandytoes » 16 Feb 2012, 17:10

T has decided that she no longer needs her highchair and insists on sitting on a big chair with us. She's been able to work her way out of the straps of the highchair for a while and then stands up in it and messes about so in some ways this is no bad thing. BUT she won't stay at the table. She is up and down and all over the place and eating very little (probably not helped by the fact that I have just gone gluten free so what she likes best is not on offer quite as much). I don't mind if she doesn't eat much - we've been through those phases before - but the constant up and down or plain refusal to sit at the table drive me batty. Any ideas?
mummy to T, born 21st August 2009

http://sandytoesanddustyfeet.wordpress.com/
Sandytoes
 
Posts: 2473
Joined: 01 Jun 2010, 17:29
Location: Reading

Re: abandoning the highchair

Postby madcatmummy » 16 Feb 2012, 17:17

If she leaves the table then there is no more on offer untill the next meal. She'll soon get the idea! AD gave up her chair at about 2 1/2. I was going to keep her in it as it's a tripp trapp but she now has an ikea cushion on a big chair instead and JT has the tripp trapp (saved a bit of money!). Hopefully after a couple of days T'll realise that if you want food you stay put. You'll need to be strong though, good luck!
mum to AD (03/09) and JT (08/11) and 2 mad cats!
madcatmummy
 
Posts: 1164
Joined: 14 Jan 2012, 21:00
Location: Central Scotland

Re: abandoning the highchair

Postby Sandytoes » 16 Feb 2012, 17:24

What - even if she hasn't even started to eat?

I have been more inclined to just leave her meal out and if she's hungry, that's what's on offer. She has lentils and fish waiting for her on the table at the moment. Occasionally she will come back hours later and eat some. But it doesn't solve the mealtime problem.
mummy to T, born 21st August 2009

http://sandytoesanddustyfeet.wordpress.com/
Sandytoes
 
Posts: 2473
Joined: 01 Jun 2010, 17:29
Location: Reading

Re: abandoning the highchair

Postby BLTMama » 16 Feb 2012, 17:44

We're going through the same thing right now -- I do the same as you, just leave it there and tell her she can have it if she likes, but that's dinner. It bugs me because I'd really like to be one of those "it's dinnertime and we're all eating dinner" families, but if she won't sit I don't know how I could possibly make her without it becoming a great big hairy deal. I've tried taking her dinner away, but she usually hollers bloody murder about it a few seconds later and I feel ridiculous telling her she can't eat her broccoli. Plus, my overriding goal is that dinnertime not be a horror show. :D

I usually do say something like "it's nice when all eat together, but if you can't sit right now that's okay." I'm hopeful that she'll realize that it's more fun to be a part of dinner, but my feeling is if she's just in a phase where it's hard for her to sit still and focus, that's the phase (it's a phase, it's all a phase) she's in.
♥ Mom to Badger Dec 2009 and Little Tarsier Jun 2013 ♥
BLTMama
 
Posts: 3243
Joined: 05 Jun 2010, 15:23
Location: Idaho!

Re: abandoning the highchair

Postby catkin » 16 Feb 2012, 17:57

Our approach is that mouse can come and go if he wants, but we will stay at the table as long as we want. As he's naturally sociable he generally wants to be where everybody else is. His food stays out while we're eating, when we finish I'd check with him he doesn't want any more then put it away. When he was younger and I didn't want him to leave the kitchen on his own I would shut the kitchen door and ask him to stay in the room while it was meal time.
It's probably in part the novelty value of being able to escape. Mouse was up and down a lot more when he first got released from the high chair. (And even more when he had learned to escape the high chair but we were still trying to put him in it.)
Mum to Mouse b May 2009 & Little Hamster b Feb 2012.
catkin
 
Posts: 5232
Joined: 20 Nov 2009, 19:22
Location: W. Sussex, UK

Re: abandoning the highchair

Postby madcatmummy » 16 Feb 2012, 18:53

I must say, I can't abide my friends toddler running about whilst eating and I guess having taken a tough line early on AD doesn't leave the table until she's finished her meal (unless it's for the toilet, but we do try and make her go before she sits down to dinner). She may not have the widest palate in the world but she does have good manners! :)
mum to AD (03/09) and JT (08/11) and 2 mad cats!
madcatmummy
 
Posts: 1164
Joined: 14 Jan 2012, 21:00
Location: Central Scotland

Re: abandoning the highchair

Postby mathsgirl » 16 Feb 2012, 20:18

Its probably a phase with the novelty of being able to get in and out of the chair herself. We have a tripp trapp and DD has been able to get in and out herself since about 18 months when we took the bar off. When she was younger she did get up and down alot. We generally ignored it, we would always stay at the table and so really the most interesting place to be was at the table. Sometimes she would ask us to come and play we always said, no, we are eating at the table. She did grow out of it as now she sits at the table as long as she is eating. She is usually finished before us, tells us when she is full and then gets down. Our policy is that if she is finished it is unfair to make her sit with us until we are finished.
mathsgirl
 
Posts: 945
Joined: 14 Oct 2009, 08:48
Location: UK

Re: abandoning the highchair

Postby catkin » 16 Feb 2012, 21:11

madcatmummy wrote:I must say, I can't abide my friends toddler running about whilst eating and I guess having taken a tough line early on AD doesn't leave the table until she's finished her meal (unless it's for the toilet, but we do try and make her go before she sits down to dinner). She may not have the widest palate in the world but she does have good manners! :)

Running whilst eating is another matter, I'd see that as a safety issue and definitely not allow it.
Mum to Mouse b May 2009 & Little Hamster b Feb 2012.
catkin
 
Posts: 5232
Joined: 20 Nov 2009, 19:22
Location: W. Sussex, UK

Re: abandoning the highchair

Postby twilightfan » 16 Feb 2012, 21:18

I've struggled with this too but the boy was sitting at a chair at about 22 months & I just never expected him to stay still during the whole meal as he was too young imo. Anyway, he still gets up but when he does I always ask if he wants any more & ensure he sits down before he puts food in his mouth. I'm sure it is a phase but may well try MCM's approach if it shows no sign of ending.
DS born 2010 and BLW since July 2010
twilightfan
 
Posts: 2003
Joined: 26 May 2010, 21:42
Location: UK

Re: abandoning the highchair

Postby shye » 16 Feb 2012, 22:24

This is a learning curve for her too. I can't remember exactly what we did with E, but I think it was just reminding him that we sit down to eat at tea time. Now, a year later, he has warnings and it is taken away, or left for later if I'm feeling generous. It really depends. Sometimes he is simply not hungry. I can't abide by the get up and down thing though so I must have given him 3 chances and then moved the plate away, which told inevitably results in him sitting still.
Mummy to E (nov 08) and Birdy (dec 10)
shye
 
Posts: 7875
Joined: 14 Apr 2009, 19:28

Re: abandoning the highchair

Postby Disco » 16 Feb 2012, 22:39

Ugh. we've had this for quite a while. It really annoys me. Sometimes if its something he really likes he'll stay and eat but usually he is up and down, or just down from the beginning if he was no interest in whats on his plate.

Hmmm. I might have to start taking a tougher approach like some of you have. We'll see. As Badger's mommy said. ultimately I don't want it to be a battleground so thats why I usually let it go. hmmm.
mama to two summer boys S (09) and A (12)

http://www.eilidhweir.com/
Disco
 
Posts: 5967
Joined: 22 Feb 2010, 13:53
Location: Scotland

Re: abandoning the highchair

Postby Sandytoes » 17 Feb 2012, 11:13

I agree I don't want it to become a battleground. She didn't fancy her lunch today so she got down and we basically just let her go and took very little notice of her for the rest of the meal. If she's hungry later I'll probably tell her to go back and eat it. Hoping that she'll eventually get the message that that's what's for lunch, and also that being at the table with us is more interesting than being away.
mummy to T, born 21st August 2009

http://sandytoesanddustyfeet.wordpress.com/
Sandytoes
 
Posts: 2473
Joined: 01 Jun 2010, 17:29
Location: Reading


Return to Toddler Led Eating

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users