Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Oh my God, look! Your baby is eating broccoli!
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Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby LilyRose » 29 Dec 2015, 15:45

My little sprout is 7 months old. BLW since 6 months, and was doing well, I thought. I include him in mealtimes if he is awake for them (prob gets 2-4 a day), and he is feeding himself well.

I got him weighed today and he has dropped 2 lines on his chart. I got a real grilling about what he eats....and a strong suggestion that we should move to purees. I'm so upset - he is an obliging little soul so I'm sure he would let me spoon feed him....but I really don't want to!

He is quite uninterested in BFing at the moment but has gone back to 2 (or 3!) night feeds so I am going with that at the moment. Offering extra feeds and I will offer more snacks. The trouble is that he will sit and eat for as long as the twins do....but as soon as they get down to play, so does he. So I need super high calorie food to get into him.


I'd appreciate any thoughts...and some hand-holding :(
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby Lily » 29 Dec 2015, 19:59

Silly HV, panicking you. Don't worry, it's totally normal for them to have periods of gaining more slowly; as long as he's not actually losing weight, that's fine, and chances are he will even out soon. You're not recommended to weigh them too frequently at this age, because the fluctuations can be needlessly worrying.

It sounds like he's doing really well with his eating, but getting distractable with breastfeeding. Have you tried breastfeeding him in a darkened room? Milk is the most calorific thing he can eat (much more so than watery purees), but other good fatty foods include avocado, nut butters, Greek yogurt. Honestly though, he sounds fine!
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby Kitcameron » 29 Dec 2015, 20:37

Yes, what Lily said, ignore the HV. Just nod and smile and do what you're doing.
Mummy to Slinky Malinky (Sept. 12) and Chunker Munker (June 14.)
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby LilyRose » 29 Dec 2015, 21:21

Oh, thank you!! I do feel much better for the reassurance! And I can't honestly think of anything I could spoon into him that would really be much better calories than what he eats. And I have if anything not been pushing solids because I want him to BF more. So I felt all naughty and like I was starving my precious boy.

She wanted us back in a month but I might give it a bit longer. Honestly, he has great rolls of podge round his legs and arms and a round little tummy - he doesn't look like a hungry baby!! I was thinking of making some creamy rice pudding and letting him go on that. And he had some toast with clotted cream on which he seemed to enjoy.

I love the idea of nut butters but am terrifyingly allergic to them so can't have them in the house. Anything else that has good fat in it? All I could think of to chub him up was dairy things and I am a bit cautious about too much dairy fat....

Thank you again!!!
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby emzit » 29 Dec 2015, 21:27

Sounds like you're doing a great job! I agree with what the others said but also wanted to add that my boy dropped from the 98th percentile at birth to hover around the 25th percentile, so lots of lines crossed. But he is happy, healthy, meeting milestones and has tracked along that line for awhile so he is obviously meant to be there. Size at birth isn't indicative of size as they get bigger. Likewise my niece was born dead average and is now tracking at 95th percentile for height and weight!
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby Kitcameron » 29 Dec 2015, 21:29

And wait till you have a second child, you'll never weigh them so you'll never know lol
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby mamapup » 29 Dec 2015, 21:50

What KC said! I took my first once or twice, second, officially never. Ahem. Bad (sensible?) me.
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby yorkshirepudding » 29 Dec 2015, 22:30

Not sure if you could have it, or if it's nice!, but there is sunflower seed butter (sun butter) that probably has similar fats to nut butters. Tahini? Hummus too, could make your own without sesame if you can't have that. And yes to the second child thing!keep thinking I should take E but haven't heard much useful stuff from my local hv's so probably not worth it!
Mummy to my little Christmas pudding, Moo, December 2012 and a summer pudding, baby E born June 2015
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby sabrina fair » 29 Dec 2015, 22:41

I've found that HVs fall into 2 categories: 1) they don't know what they're talking about, have outdated views and basically try to justify their existence by commenting on stuff which isn't really an issue; and 2) they're brilliant and agree with everything I'm doing (that I learned about on the forum!) and don't have any advice to give me.

Neither are of any use to me because I have this place and then an excellent GP when there's actual medical stuff that I need help with. Smile and nod; smile and nod!
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby emzit » 30 Dec 2015, 05:45

Oh, and the other good tip if you do go again and they ask what she's eating, is just list the food you've given him. Not necessarily what he's eaten, but what you've given him the opportunity to try. 'Oh, yes, he's doing ever so well, he's had potato, carrots, duck, olives, all those kind of things, but his absolute favourite is kale and quinoa stir fry..' They tend to assume you've fed it and leave it there.
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby LilyRose » 30 Dec 2015, 13:15

Do you know what, he's my 3rd!!! You would think I would have learned my lesson!! The HV used to make me go every fortnight with the twins (you can imagine how fun it is taking twins to be weighed), so I have felt v naughty about just going every month!! And I really wanted to ask them if I needed to take him to the GP about his pooing - twice a week and accompanied by screams and palaver! Her answer to that was purees too!

Right, he had a good feed in a quiet room, then ate loads of rice pudding with clotted cream (I helped him finish it!!) and we will have roast pumpkin for supper so I will put olive oil on his. Have made some little apple pies which can also have cream on them and will do meatballs for tomorrow. I bought some tahini today (sesame very safe) and there is sunflower seed butter and a mixed seed bitter in Holland and Barrett - would that be as good for him as nuts?

Thanks again. And it's a great tip to just tell them what he's eating. He is actually trying everything....just he is only just learning so not too much is going in!!
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby yorkshirepudding » 30 Dec 2015, 16:08

My lo is 6 months and she is still just tasting things, a bit of evidence of swallowing but I still just give her a couple of bits with no expectation she will eat it. But then I haven't had the hv scaring me! She is quite dinky I think but I'm just more relaxed.
Mummy to my little Christmas pudding, Moo, December 2012 and a summer pudding, baby E born June 2015
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby UnhappyRightFoot » 30 Dec 2015, 21:24

Those flippin' lines on growth charts have accounted for more sleepless nights than I care to remember. Nobody grows at a steady, standard, line-following rate. It just doesn't happen. Some gain faster than others, some more weeks and less in others. To expect any child, fed in any way, to follow an exact line is ludicrous and can cause a lot of upset for parents who think there is immediately a problem if their child doesn't do what the graph dictates.

HV should know this better than anyone. I agree, HV are so hit and miss in how they approach families, their knowledge and understanding and their communication - I'm surprised some are allowed to do the job to be honest. The one I saw the most when Munchie was tiny was so lovely and supporting. She was a rubbish eater (illness then teething then holiday then teething yadda yadda yadda) and weighed exactly the same on her first birthday as she did at 7 months. But my HV didn't bat an eyelid and said she was a happy baby, meeting her milestones and just to keep doing what we were doing. She never suggested puree weaning. Not once. At 13 months, I took her for a weigh and there was another HV there ("mine" - the one connected to my GP, who I'd avoided like the plague since our first meeting so I'd been going to a different centre all those months) and she opened up the red book and looked shocked and asked "what an earth have you been doing with her?". Any confidence I'd finally mustered through this weaning process shattered in an instant. She made me feel like I'd been starving her - just in one comment.

If your HV is less than supportive or helpful, then find another or take him less often. It's an easy thing to say when you've been through it as I (and others here) have, but it is as easy as that. Only go if you have a specific issue - and even then you don't need to have him weighed. Look at the baby, not the scales. And ignore the bloody lines.
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby LilyRose » 01 Jan 2016, 14:49

Thank you!! I honestly don't know why I let her upset me so much - it was the thought that I was starving my little previous darling!! Honestly, I went straight to the supermarket and came home with loads of fat!! And like I said, he's short but he's ever so chubby!

I am finding the balance between the BF and the food hard though (and obviously can't ask my HV!). If he is hungry, which do I offer first? I tend to give food if it is a meal time (twins have 3 meals and 2 snacks so it often is!) or BF otherwise....
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Re: Have just been told off by the health visitor....

Postby emzit » 01 Jan 2016, 19:54

If he is hungry, bf first. He's still too little to realise food fills him up.
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