Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

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Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby mamapup » 13 Jun 2016, 08:43

Oh my god. I knew the fucky fours could be a shocker but on day one? Before lunch? Seriously? He's been so amazing recently, all lulling me in to a false sense of security, clearly. He's been rational, thoughtful and sweet for weeks so this morning was a bit of a slap.

We let him choose a birthday bike about four weeks ago. With the puppy if we didn't let him choose he'd never ride, despite begging for a bike with stabilisers as he's hated the balance bike from day one. We gave in and let him choose. He got a crappy spiderman thing. He's ridden it a few times in the garden but was adamant he didn't want to ride it to nursery until he was actually four. He's been excited all week to ride it today. So obviously we got to the helmet putting on moment, he did his fake retching and told me he can't ride it until he's five. Argh.

After a quick (on way to work so had to be quick) discussion I told him he wasn't allowed on the bak of little croc's trike anymore (has a standing space for him) as he's too big and it's breaking her bike (true) so his options are walking or riding his bike. Cue screaming for the entire mile to nursery.

I couldn't prise either of them off me at nursery then because they were so traumatised by the screaming. He is one stubborn little boy. I've told him he has to think about this very hard as we're not keeping a new bike he hasn't used. Either he rides it or we sell it and that in future he won't be allowed to ask for expensive presents because we can't trust him to actually use them.

I really hope he uses this bloody bike!

(anyone else have a kid who so vehemently hates helmet straps on their necks?)
In my heart I am Rascalpup, a name awarded during battle with one persistent spammer. I like to think ironside but with sarcasm rather than an axe.

Slightly horrified by my huge number of posts.


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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby UnhappyRightFoot » 13 Jun 2016, 08:56

School girl error MP. Never ever think they've turned a corner with their behaviour - they hear your thoughts, you know! And if you dare to say it out loud, even when several miles away from them, they know. And will change - in an instant!!!!

No clue on the straps, I'm afraid - except perhaps let him do them up or watch you in a mirror? Has that always been a problem or just today?? Sounds like he's just having one and needs to be left with it for a while. Don't mention it and fingers crossed, he'll come round.
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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby mamapup » 13 Jun 2016, 09:02

he's been like this with the helmet since day one.
In my heart I am Rascalpup, a name awarded during battle with one persistent spammer. I like to think ironside but with sarcasm rather than an axe.

Slightly horrified by my huge number of posts.


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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby yorkshirepudding » 13 Jun 2016, 09:17

I can appreciate the helmet strap thing, I think Moo would be the same if he didn't love his bike so much. No advice sorry! Hope you manage to have a calm day despite the screamy start.
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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby emzit » 13 Jun 2016, 09:28

Oh no! We had the same, sweetness and light and 4 days before he turned 4 he totally changed.

No advice on the helmet, ours have both loved riding more than they disliked helmets because they know it's non-negotiable (and illegal here). Is it the straps going around his neck or feel of the straps on his skin? Could padding them a bit work?
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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby Cofa's Tree » 13 Jun 2016, 09:31

Happy birthday puppy! Could it just be birthday excitement getting to him? If you stand firm on the bike or walk option, would he choose bike (eventually)?
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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby mamapup » 13 Jun 2016, 09:35

He has hated the helmet since he got his first balance bike. I don't know what it is. We bought a second helmet thinking it might be something wrong with the first but it's the same issue. I think it's just a new feeling and he refuses to get used to it. He wants to ride his bike.

We let him ride in the garden without a helmet but if we go out it's also non-negotiable with us and he knows that. I am banking on him eventually choosing bike over walking as we will be standing very firm on the option.

I hate leaving him (them) at nursery like this. And on his birthday too but I had to take a stand. This parenting lark is ridiculous sometimes.
In my heart I am Rascalpup, a name awarded during battle with one persistent spammer. I like to think ironside but with sarcasm rather than an axe.

Slightly horrified by my huge number of posts.


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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby LucyLastic » 13 Jun 2016, 10:01

So the helmet is the issue not the bike? Have you tried getting him to 'love the helmet' - stickers or getting a Spiderman one? Is he interested in astronauts or soldiers or any other profession (superhero?) where they wear helmets? Or trips somewhere he'll want to go but only if he goes on the bike, ie you go for ice cream or whatever with little croc and MrC stays at home with the puppy if he refuses. So you're not deliberately excluding him but it's his choice. Or try getting him to wear the helmet round the house for games, maybe with the strap undone to start with? It could be that the strap is somehow uncomfortable. I don't know. I've exhausted all of my ideas other than 'move somewhere rural and drive everywhere thus avoiding the bicycle problem altogether' :-D
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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby mamapup » 13 Jun 2016, 10:11

It is a stupid spiderman helmet!
In my heart I am Rascalpup, a name awarded during battle with one persistent spammer. I like to think ironside but with sarcasm rather than an axe.

Slightly horrified by my huge number of posts.


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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby junglewonderland » 13 Jun 2016, 12:46

(((Mp)))) what a day. Sorry it didn't turn out how you had hoped!

Are you sure you are not talking about Koala? On special days where we have special things planned (like birthdays) he totally loses the plot. I think the change of routine must overwhelm him a bit. And if I buy him something I think he'll love, even if he asks for it or chooses it, he refuses to use it. So annoying! Until we ignore it for a while then he comes around in his own time.

I reckon in time he will ride the bike, but might just need some time to come around to it?
Mama to Feb boys, Koala (2012) and Taz (2015).
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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby Treeb » 13 Jun 2016, 12:54

L hated his helmet too. We lived in an apartment complex and let him ride around the parking area without it, but set the rule that he couldn't go out on the sidewalk or road without, so he chose not to ride his bike to go anywhere.

Then we moved to a new house, on a small street with tons of kids who ride their bikes up and down whenever the weather is nice. We let him go out a couple of times without the helmet but then put our foot down. By then he was already good at the balance bike and loved racing all these new kids, so that was the motivation to finally get him to wear the helmet.

We did buy a second helmet thinking maybe there first wasn't fitting right, but he ended up going back to the original. What worked for us was starting out with the straps super loosened and just hanging down below his chin. It obviously wasn't doing much good as a helmet, but was more concerned with getting him used to wearing it. Once he was comfortable with it and willingly wearing it I started sneakily tightening it a tiny bit at a time between bike rides, and he is now wearing it properly adjusted without complaint.

Good luck! It's so frustrating when there's that disconnect between wanting them to ride and enjoy it, but also needing to be firm about safety.
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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby sabrina fair » 13 Jun 2016, 13:21

I find my usually sweet, mature little man becomes a nightmare in the run up to - and on - special occasions like birthdays and Christmas. He can't handle the excitement and he becomes obnoxious. Hopefully once Puppy's birthday is actually over he might calm down.
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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby mamapup » 13 Jun 2016, 18:50

Treeb, good idea. He says he'll try it looser and see about tightening over time.

He was great after nursery until we fed him Xmas pudding and remains of birthday cake. Then he was pumped full of sugar and a bit crazy at bedtime. Whoops. We never normally do much sugar before bed, now.i know why!
In my heart I am Rascalpup, a name awarded during battle with one persistent spammer. I like to think ironside but with sarcasm rather than an axe.

Slightly horrified by my huge number of posts.


One puppy June 2012 and one little croc March 2014
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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby Kanga » 13 Jun 2016, 19:03

We got given some Krispy Kreme doughnuts yesterday & let the children have one after their tea...then regretted it!

Ds1 turned 4 on Saturday but has been hard work for a while, not significantly worse since Saturday. Yet anyway!!
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Re: Welcome to the fucky fours, puppy

Postby busmother » 13 Jun 2016, 20:54

Our bike helmets won't do up tight. They told us in the bike shop that because they're ones with an adjustable headband, if they fit firmly around the head, the chinstrap doesn't need to be tight. So perhaps it would be worth looking into one like that, if that's the main issue?
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