Giving up for Lent

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Giving up for Lent

Postby busmother » 11 Feb 2016, 12:55

We are not religious. My children go to a Catholic school, because it's just over the road. I knew it was pancake day on Tuesday but didn't think beyond that, and am slightly taken aback that P's class were asked to write down what they are giving up for Lent and P has apparently written 'sweet things'. It's half term next week, my niece and nephew are coming to stay, I'm imagining trips to cafe with cake and hot chocolate, baking at home, puddings. I don't want to test her resolve for the sake of it, but equally don't particularly make the rest of us (if I'm honest, primarily me) forgo all these things on her behalf. But since she has written it, I don't want to make her go back on her word either. A little bit annoyed with the school for not mentioning it, as we could have discussed beforehand what would be a good thing to try and give up. And perhaps with myself, for not seeing this coming. Not sure what advice I need, or whether I just need to vent.
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Re: Giving up for Lent

Postby Lily » 11 Feb 2016, 15:37

How incredibly frustrating. Maybe you could talk to P and come to a face-saving compromise? I'm envisaging something like 'perhaps what you really meant to write was...' Would it work if she gave up sweets/chocolate/pop, but still had cake, puddings etc? Healthy, but not joyless, and she'd have a better chance of sticking to her resolution.
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Re: Giving up for Lent

Postby Raktajino » 11 Feb 2016, 18:46

Can you use it as an opportunity to discuss her beliefs versus those of others? This sort of thing will come up again if she is non religious at a religious school. Does she understand why she was asked to give up something over lent? Why not talk her through the bible story and ask her if she believes it to be true, and ask if she feels its important to remember it by giving something up. If it's all meaningless to her, what's the point! You can help her understand the value of it for Christians, and that its ok that we don't all believe the same things
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Re: Giving up for Lent

Postby Kanga » 11 Feb 2016, 19:37

I'd be with lily & suggest maybe giving up sweets themselves, rather than all sweet things. Or if she really wants to do it explain you still want to eat cake etc & see if that changes her mind ;)
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Re: Giving up for Lent

Postby beebop » 11 Feb 2016, 20:41

I think giving up sweets sounds the way to go. Since she probably doesn't have them often anyway it won't be very hard.
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Re: Giving up for Lent

Postby Treeb » 11 Feb 2016, 21:24

I'd go with Raktajino's suggestion of using this to talk to her about how different people have different things that are important/meaningful to them and to see how she really feels about it.

She probably felt like she was pressured and had to write something for it, and it's likely that giving up treats was an example given, so probably she just said that because she felt that she was supposed to. She might find it a relief if you explain that this isn't a tradition your family usually does to follow, and give her "permission" not to do it if she doesn't actually want to.
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Re: Giving up for Lent

Postby ches » 12 Feb 2016, 04:39

I don't see why you have to give things up because she is. Lent is a personal sacrifice, and its not a sacrifice of there's no temptation. Also, you get Sundays off, which, not being Catholic, I didn't know until recently.
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Re: Giving up for Lent

Postby mamapup » 12 Feb 2016, 21:54

I'd also explain why catholics do it and that she doesn't have to be a Catholic if she doesn't want...that you aren't and daddy isn't, etc. And then explain that because you're not a Catholic you're not giving anything up. She's welcome to do so but you won't be changing the house for her.

If you give her words to explain this at school she'll be fine, no? I remember my mum givinge permission and language around certain things (like not having to finish my lunch at school because "mummy says she pays and she says I don't have to". Ahem, yes I was probably annoying)
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