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Encouraging words whilst eating....

PostPosted: 16 Sep 2007, 15:55
by supernim
I am getting bored of saying the same encouraging words to Lily whilst she is eating and looking for inspiration. At the moment I am sure her first words are going to be 'mmmm, tasty delicious!' or 'yummy' as it's all I seem to say to her!

Any alternatives that you can offer me?

PostPosted: 16 Sep 2007, 16:39
by Aitch
ah, well it's an interesting area actually. i remember reading a thread on Mumsnet about this when i first started weaning, and it was all about how/whether you should react when your children eat. (they weren't talking about babies, i hasten to add).

anyway, lots of people were saying they did that kinda 'oh well done etc' business but i was quite taken with the people who said that they remained fairly impassive throughout, becuase then that removed the whole 'eat your food and make mummy happy' dynamic.

now, i'm speaking as someone who is pathologically unable to leave food on a plate because of all the 'clear your plate and you'll get dessert' stuff when i was a kid.

so if babybear was gagging we'd pull some 'nyum-nyum' chewing faces, and we always ask her if she's enjoying dinner and make some 'delicious/oh this is lovely' type noises but we actually don't tend to make much comment on whether or not she eats or how well. (and i'm glad to say that she eats fine so far, so my attitude might be different were that not the case).

so i dunno, i think it's totally interesting. i'm 36 and i'm still working on not clearing my plate so all this stuff must get imprinted on your brain...
anyway, lol, that wasn't really what you were asking was it?


PostPosted: 16 Sep 2007, 18:17
by AB&M
We need to swap Aitch! My mum used to say if she gave me 2 peas I'd leave 1 as I always have to leave some. Cutting down on my portions has helped so maybe if you upped yours? ('scuse the pun!!).

When we sit down to eat with Bruno we chat as if he were part of the conversation so he gets a few yummy yummy's, nyum nyum is one I do alot when I'm pretending to eat a bit during the day if he's eating alone or I've finished already.

I try not to look at him too much other than as if he were my dinner date so he doesn't get stressed about the food. Although, tbh, we have more of a problem with distraction & food or milk. If you smile, he smiles back and then forgets all about eating /drinking!!

PostPosted: 18 Sep 2007, 13:45
by EmilyinFrance
L, as the third child, gets completely ignored when she's eating, and has to grab things off someone else's plate or throw it all on the floor to get attention. So am pleased to discover that it's good to stay impassive - does ignoring her count?
I think I paid her more attention in the early days, though, as her childminder was v impressed by the high-pitched 'mmmmm' sound she emitted on seeing / being handed food, and these days, if she's in the pushchair or car and fancies a snack, she'll turn to me and yell 'NYUM-NYUM!' at the top of her little voice, with vigourous nodding.
But at mealtimes she just gets a plate of whatever we're having, and gets on with it by herself.

PostPosted: 18 Sep 2007, 14:50
by TinkerbellesMum
I remain fairly impassive with her, if I think she is waning I may encourage her but only if I can see she still wants but tiredness is taking over (the big internal wrestle she goes through daily, food or sleep, the two most important things in her life!)

I agree with the making Mummy happy statement. I make sure food is purely about her, no rewards, no making anyone else happy. I don't clean her (as far as possible) where she sits, I don't take away her main before I add desert.

PostPosted: 18 Sep 2007, 17:13
by AB&M
I think its really important to not give off those subconscious clues that could give rise to a food issue later in life. I've also started the dessert while dinner is still on his tray (we aren't at the plate stage) so today Bruno had plum & carrot. Yummy!

PostPosted: 19 Sep 2007, 08:03
by TinkerbellesMum
I remembered this morning a way that we are not so passive with her, Tink is under the impression that everyone in the same room as her is there to be a cup bearer and if it's not good enough for the cup bearer, it goes on the floor!

I have to try to distract her, when we eat out, to let Mummy try because random strangers that just happen to walk past, don't generally want to share her soggy food!

PostPosted: 19 Sep 2007, 10:58
by AB&M
LOL! I can just see her now, handing something half-eaten to the lady on the table next door! How to get invited back to a party :D

PostPosted: 21 Sep 2007, 14:40
by supernim
interesting reading - never thought about it from the point of view of them eating to make mummy happy - I now don;t feel quite so bad for the times when I am too tired to say 'mmm yummy' to her and gaze off into space munching my own share of plum quarters!