5 year old wetting

Cloth nappies, disposies, potty training... the inevitable result of BLW. What goes in, must come out.

5 year old wetting

Postby Freyasmama » 09 Jun 2015, 18:39

Hi everyone. I'm not new to this forum, I have been using it for advise since starting weaning my now 5 year old little girl! I am a lurker though, not a poster for which I apologise!

I hope you don't mind me asking a question now after all this time but my OH and myself are at our wits end with DD.

She is wetting herself both at school and at home about 3 times a day. Not full wettings but enough to get her knickers wet. Sometimes the teachers notice and change her and other times she comes home with the knickers on but you can see by marks they have been wet multiple times.

We just don't know what to do. We have tried telling her off, ignoring it and just getting new pants, taking away treats or things she likes to do and even reward charts for a trip or a treat.
Nothing seems to work.

I am hoping someone may have some advise. Is this any sort of normal for 5? It's every day unless the teachers have a good day and remind her to go all the time.

Thanks for reading.
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Joined: 08 Jan 2013, 17:53

Re: 5 year old wetting

Postby lisbeth » 10 Jun 2015, 01:03

Lots of sympathy - your post struck a chord with me, though my daughter has soiled pants 1-3 times a day.

Have you talked to a GP at all? Is the wetting fairly constant? I've talked to lots of people about PT in the year since we started, and I've come across one case of persistent wetting, that eventually just stopped on its own and had no obvious cause.

I took my daughter to the GP, and regretted it because it so upset her that she gave up trying altogether for a couple of months and had both wet and dirty pants. With hindsight I wish I'd talked to the doctor without my daughter present. However, all along I felt that she wasn't in general doing it deliberately, and now I am fairly convinced that she is just late developing the necessary sensation and control. So we are just waiting, and trying not to make a fuss, because when she gets anxious, things definitely get worse.

One thing that does seem to make her more aware of her need to go to the loo is to be naked... I'd avoided it for ages and ages, for fear of the consequences of an accident, but it was the only thing we hadn't tried, and actually it seems to nudge her awareness above a threshold, because after the first initial accident, we haven't had another in about a month. I am hoping that the bare bottomed time after tea, when she does actually sometimes take herself to the bathroom, will help her learn the cues when she is dressed.

I am sorry not to be more helpful, but there's a lot of experience here, and hopefully someone else will have more directly relevant advice!
A 2011, R 2012
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Re: 5 year old wetting

Postby Raktajino » 10 Jun 2015, 17:22

That sounds so frustrating! Do you think she has any control over it? I mean without being told to, does she take herself to the toilet at reasonable intervals? And does she dribble or leak in the meantime? Or is she ignoring her full bladder and just loosing control? Is this a new thing, or has she never been totally dry?
Does she have any obvious worries or anxieties you can put your finger on? Lots of questions, I'm sorry. I guess it could be either later than average bladder control, a physical problem like an overactive or small bladder or the result of stree or anxiety.

I second the advice to see the gp or school nurse without your daughter. I don't think medics worry about bladder control untill 7 years, since everyone develops differently, but they will be able to offer some advice and reasurance at the very least. If the accidents are a new thing after being completely dry, I think you can acess help from CAMHS. There's also a website that I found really useful for advice http://www.eric.org.uk whenwe were dealing with dd cconstipation.
Mum to Sausage, born July 2011
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Re: 5 year old wetting

Postby busmother » 11 Jun 2015, 21:21

Not an expert. My 5 year old still has a sodden nappy (or bed) every night without fail, but she's fine during the day. I thought that the advice on night-time wetting was not to worry until they were 7, but having just had our school induction, the school nurse there said that they had a clinic for bedwetting and to see your GP because it was more effective if tackled sooner. I've yet to follow this up, and I don't know if it's relevent to your day-time wetting, and I've no idea how they go about tackling it, but it sounds like seeing a GP might be a good start, and perhaps without your daughter there (good tip, Lisbeth).
Mother to twin buses, born 2010, and number 3, born 2015
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Re: 5 year old wetting

Postby Freyasmama » 12 Jun 2015, 16:53

Thanks all, have just managed to pop on so thank you for your replies. Will read through properly once the littlies are in bed and able to do a proper response.
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Joined: 08 Jan 2013, 17:53

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