Gill Rapley Webchat

[gillrapley]

OK. Because of all the techy glitches I'm resorting to cutting and pasting and composing replies offline, then submitting them in chunks - hope that's OK.

bean77: can i ask at nearly 10 months my little pup is hardly eating a thing, is this normal and how long should i leave it before my breast milk alone wont be enough.....Im getting worried as the 12 month mark creeps up...as food is for fun till year one BUT what happens after that??????????
Unless you are actually concerned about your baby's health, there's no need to do anything. Some babies take this long - some are even over a year before they really get the plot. There really isn't much that breastmilk doesn't have enough of - mainly iron and zinc. So if you're offering meat, all should be well. At the end of the day, what's the alternative - force feeding?? That just can't be right. And incidentally, by this age lots of spoon-fed babies are starting to assert themselves and become 'difficult' eaters, so please don't assume your pup would be better off that way.

Hanaflower: Iron. I am worried that DS is not getting enough. He doesn't really like meat or green veg (except courgettes, but I don't think they count.
No-one really knows the answer to this but they really do only need small amounts if they’re breastfed. So long as you’re offering, you just need to trust.
Sugar. How much is too much? Is a bit of custard going to kill him? (My mother thinks I'm depriving him by not feeding nursery pudding at every meal)
I think the clue is in ‘every meal’. A little of what you fancy doesn’t harm. In fact anyone who asks that question probably isn’t going to do anything bad. Just look at all the toddlers feasting on lollipops to get a sense of perspective!
Salt. Same again really - how much should I worry when we are on holiday and the only thing he will eat is (quite salty) bread?[/quote]
Same again, really. Not a problem – unless you are on holiday every week!

WhatFreshHellIsThis: Where do you stand on handing babies food? I successfully BLW'd my now three year old and am starting again with six month old son number two. He is MUCH more interested in food if I hand it to him (particularly if I was eating it first..... )than if it's placed in front of him, but the book says that he should learn to pick things up for himself. Any thoughts?
Fine to hold food out for a baby to take/grab – only polite, really! But let the baby reach out to your hand to take it. The problem comes when people close a baby’s hand round a piece of food when they’re really not old enough to do this for themselves.

Toogoodoo: If there is time towards the end (as mine are approaching 3 and 18 months) I was just wondering what to do if in true BLW style your children pick and choose what to eat at each meal (one goes for carbs, then meat and rarely veg and is pretty chunky, the other meat, veg, then carbs and is very lean!).
Sounds fine - as long as the meal consists of some of each of these, then the children should get what they need. There’s really no way I know of to control this (without getting in to the sort of fights that BLW usually prevents) – and they may swap over from time to time anyway! No need to get into the business of cooking separate meals – not necessary, and not a good plan.

Bananamum: One (slightly cheeky) question I have wondered is whether, if you could rename Baby Led Weaning, whether you would do? I ask because it is a bit of a mouthful and I know that some people hear the name and immediately think 'gimmick' and 'marketing', which are so far from the truth!
Hmmm. I might be tempted, if only because of confusion worldwide over what is meant by ‘weaning’ (stopping breastfeeding is the meaning in lots of countries). But I have to say I can’t think of anything that wouldn’t sound just as gimmicky. And, although I’m credited with giving BLW its name, I don’t actually remember naming it being an ‘event’. The name just caught on – so that must count for something?#

Brownowl: … he is often very picky about new foods even when he is hungry, not wanting to pick them up or have a taste until you 'wipe' the food on his mouth to give him a taste and then he dives straight in. Is this fairly typical for some babies / is there anything I can do to help him be brave to explore more?
Not heard of this before BUT – they’re all different – hooray! Great idea to wipe the food over his mouth (so long as he doesn’t mind). The best suggestion I have is simply to eat with him and ‘model’ what you hope he’ll copy.

Mae’r: Zack hasn't poo'd for 12 days (and counting). Coincides with an increase in solids, blw style. Is this common for babies? Will going to the Dr benefit? He's not unhappy, just the odd straining session.
The doctor will probably suggest a mild laxative but then you’ll never know how long he might have gone without it (and still been fine)! If Z seems happy, I’d be inclined to sit it out. How old is he now? Is he otherwise breastfed? If so, did he go long periods between poos when fully breastfed? If he’s not having much in the way of food yet, it may just be an extreme example of what some breastfed babies do anyway.

[clh]

hi gill
going really well been doing for 2 weeks but a couple of things
whento work up to 3 meals do we start slowly dont want to overload her little tummy
any foods to avoid keep getting mixed advice
do they really stop when full seems like will eat and eat

[Della]

Hi Gill,

We're 3.5months in and LO is over 9months now. She eats well, although not very much. She's healthy and happy and sleeps well. She doesn't seem to manage to swallow alot of food though and alot ends up coming out. We weighed her yesterday and it seems that she hasn't put any weight on for 2 months. I'm already having to go back to the doctors for a weight check as she'd dropped percentiles at 7months.
I haven't told my doctor that I'm BLW and I know from what he said before he wouldn't agree.
I know the doctor will expect me to shove more food in. She has 4 bottles of Formula a day too, as we just last week finished breastfeeding as i'm going back to work soon. #Is this lack of weight gain a concern at 9months?

I really don't want to stop BLW as we do enjoy it and it makes us feel like a lovely little family sat around the table each night together.

[SammysMom]

We just started, so I'm sort of feeling my way into this. What advice would you give for a baby who gets really impatient? My son gets so frustrated when things fall out of his hand, or he just can't get food out of his fist and into his mouth. I'll offer it to him, and he tries to bring his mouth to my hand instead of taking it himself. Eventually it just all gets too much for him and he starts screaming. (I DO feed him a bottle an hour or so before dinner time, so it's not that he's starving. He just gets mad 'cause he can't get the hang of it.) My husband thinks this is insanity and we should go with purees if the baby is getting this upset. Help?

[sparkling]

Hi - first a thankyou - we've only just started but I found the book very easy to read and feel equipped both to get on with blw and to defend my decision to do so!

My question is about allergies. Neither myself or my husband have any food allergies but my sister is allergic to most raw fruit and nuts (cause an itchy mouth) and is wheat intolerant. She has had excema since she was a baby but most of her food problems have emerged through her teens and twenties. Should I be introducing foods one at a time or do you think it will be ok to let our daughter get on with it (with the usual exceptions)?

[julieg]

Hi,
sorry for last minute message, having tech problems with site tonight!
Been BLWing for 2 weeks, Ben has been great but now seems to break pieces off into his mouth and gets really distressed as can't move it around in his mouth - making family meals a bit stressful! Things that he was spitting out now seem to get 'stuck' but other things (partic carrot) are going down and out the other end! Is this just the frustration phase that will pass, should I be limiting food choices so that he can't break pieces off (hard things only?). What do you think?
Thank you!
Julie

[gillrapley]

Loubeedee: Just wanted to ask about timing for DS - he was born 6 weeks prem and is now 25 weeks (non adjusted age) and is showing a huge interest in food and, rather worryingly, is starting to lose weight so my HV has told me to start weaning him (on puree... um, don't think so). However, he can't really sit up on his own - can I still start or do I need to wait until he's fairly confident in sitting up?
Tricky – you can’t really start BLW until he can sit up well enough to reach out for food without toppling over. Sitting him on your lap with support is OK – provided he does the handling of food himself. But of course he may not really be ready to do that accurately either. The problem with giving food to a baby who isn’t really ready – either BLW or puree is that most foods are nowhere near as nutrient-rich as breastmilk (or formula) and they will tend to replace the milk, not add to it. So a baby can end up getting less nutrition this way. I would be inclined to ask for a paediatrician’s opinion to be sure of the best way to proceed.

[Jen333]

Hi Gill,
Just want to say a huge thankyou for doing the article in G2 in the Guardian. I then read your book and entered an amazing and on-going fun journey with my DD. She's doing great, she was born on 91t centile and has stayed there with BF and BLW and is now 1 year old. I've become a bit of a converter too, I have several friends following suit and further friends who don't have kids now telling their friends and families all about it. I even took Lucia to my inlaws in Cyprus and they were so impressed by this "new" method that we had neighbours coming around to see the baby feed itself!
Poor DD found it very confusing but chomped on regardless.
If I can do anything for you to help further promote BLW please let me know!
Thankyou and thankyou again!
Jeni

[lizum]

Is it possible for LO to eat too much fruit? DS is 10 months and ate two whole bananas today! And that wasn't the only fruit.
Also, I really have no clue when it comes to portion size.
And finally...thank you! It's so great watching DS tuck into a roast dinner.

[Aitch]

i've just spoken with Gill and she has most graciously agreed to stay on a while longer, so many thanks to her for putting up with the technical problems this evening. now that the oldies have decamped it seems less painful so thankfully we can continue. thanks to ALL of you for persevering.

[Sooty8]

Hi Gill
We've been BLW for about 5 months now and it's going pretty well.
Firstly, i am worried about portion sizes. My Lo can eat 30g of cheerios and 50g of blueberries after a full bf in the morning, and 50g (dry weight) of pasta for her tea (plus another couple of bits of fruit), although she is less interested in food at lunch time. Does this seem ok?
Secondly, I think she is teething today and hasn't been very keen to eat anything other than fruit. When she is like this, should I just keep giving her fruit until she refuses it or should i offer the same amount as fruit as I would usually offer...and would this apply to whatever food group she was focussing on?
Thanks for your help. The book is great btw!

[gillrapley]

Thanks for all your thanks - and for the chance to 'meet' you all! Here's the next batch:

Clh: going really well been doing for 2 weeks but a couple of things
when to work up to 3 meals do we start slowly dont want to overload her little tummy
any foods to avoid keep getting mixed advice
No need to ‘work up’ to three meals. Just let her share all the meals you can – she is quite able to avoid ‘overloading’. It’s about having the chance to play and explore as often as possible.
do they really stop when full seems like will eat and eat
Yes, they do! You just have to give it that little bit longer! (And maybe more frequent meals would in fact mean less stuffing at each one?)

Della: We're 3.5months in and LO is over 9months now. She eats well, although not very much. She's healthy and happy and sleeps well. She doesn't seem to manage to swallow alot of food though and alot ends up coming out. We weighed her yesterday and it seems that she hasn't put any weight on for 2 months. I'm already having to go back to the doctors for a weight check as she'd dropped percentiles at 7months.
I haven't told my doctor that I'm BLW and I know from what he said before he wouldn't agree.
I know the doctor will expect me to shove more food in. She has 4 bottles of Formula a day too, as we just last week finished breastfeeding as i'm going back to work soon. #Is this lack of weight gain a concern at 9months?
I really don't want to stop BLW as we do enjoy it and it makes us feel like a lovely little family sat around the table each night together.
Della, I really can’t give individual advice when I don’t know you or your baby, and it would be wrong of me to try. I think there are three things to bear in mind: 1) There is no reason to suppose you would necessarily be better off with spoon-feeding. 2) Four bottles of formula is quite a lot of milk, so I can’t imagine she would keep that up if you switched to spoon feeding. 3) There may be something that needs sorting out so it’s probably wise to get her checked out, just to be on the safe side.

[ToothFairy]

Hi Gill, a question from the oldies...
What can we do to help promote BLW, especially to health care professionals, in our local areas?

[emamum]

hi gill,. i bought your book the other day but javent had a chance to have a proper read yet... my questioon is about salt as well, how do you make sure baby dopesnt get too much when its in things you cant (or dont) make yourself such as bread,crumpets,cheese, tinned fish and is it ok to swap regular salt for the low salt stuff (for things like bread that need salt)or is it like swapping sugar for sweetners and just as bad?

thanks

my 6 month old has had a pork chop tonight, she loved it , was her first taste of meat

[gillrapley]

And there's more ...

Sammysmom: We just started, so I'm sort of feeling my way into this. What advice would you give for a baby who gets really impatient? My son gets so frustrated when things fall out of his hand, or he just can't get food out of his fist and into his mouth. I'll offer it to him, and he tries to bring his mouth to my hand instead of taking it himself. Eventually it just all gets too much for him and he starts screaming. (I DO feed him a bottle an hour or so before dinner time, so it's not that he's starving. He just gets mad 'cause he can't get the hang of it.) My husband thinks this is insanity and we should go with purees if the baby is getting this upset. Help?
This is quite common and I don’t really have an answer, except to say that it tends to be short-lived. (Maybe others can help?) Babies often get similarly frustrated with a new toy – not really very different. I agree that it isn’t a hunger problem, not least because he won’t yet have discovered that food can stop him feeling hungry – if he were hungry he’d probably refuse to try at all! Is he perhaps a bit tired and ready for a nap (having had a bottle an hour previously)? Probably a good idea to go with relatively non-slippy food for now. But maybe he just isn’t quite ready?

Sapling: My question is about allergies. Neither myself or my husband have any food allergies but my sister is allergic to most raw fruit and nuts (cause an itchy mouth) and is wheat intolerant. She has had excema since she was a baby but most of her food problems have emerged through her teens and twenties. Should I be introducing foods one at a time or do you think it will be ok to let our daughter get on with it (with the usual exceptions)?
I don’t feel qualified to answer this. Most people can find someone in their family who is allergic and the general advice is not to worry unless a first-degree relative (mother, father or sibling) is affected. Plus, it sounds as though your sister’s reactions are fairly mild (not life-threatening). Maybe a compromise is to introduce only one of the foods in question (wheat, nuts and fruit) at a time (until you’re confident there doesn’t seem to be any reaction) but to be more relaxed with other foods.