Feeling overwhelmed

More little BLWers in the making... <rubs hands>

Feeling overwhelmed

Postby t&n's mummy » 17 Apr 2015, 15:00

It's all getting a bit too much :( DH has been away all week again, I miss him and then when he is here I feel like I am doing even more. I'm stressed, tired and hurting and I seem to be saying the wrong thing all the time. N is being really testy and t just had a massive meltdown too, can't remember the last time he did that. Prob we are all tired. Everyone keeps telling me what I should be doing, even people who I thought were good friends seem to be suggesting things that are so not me/how I do stuff so it makes me feel they don't know me at all and now I feel really lonely. I thought I was a nice person but it seems not.
Mummy to T dec 09 and N Mar 12
One little angel (6w) apr 11
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Re: Feeling overwhelmed

Postby nearlymumtobabyfk » 17 Apr 2015, 16:09

Oh love, massive hugs ((( )))
Re the meltdowns, A was an emotional wreck for the last couple of weeks of my pregnancy. As soon as R came she was straight back to her old self. It's a whole lot of abstract for a child to deal with I think... Take it easy on yourself. Not long now x
Mum to A, 2010, and R, 2015
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Re: Feeling overwhelmed

Postby mamapup » 17 Apr 2015, 17:51

Hugs.
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Slightly horrified by my huge number of posts.


One puppy June 2012 and one little croc March 2014
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Re: Feeling overwhelmed

Postby yorkshirepudding » 17 Apr 2015, 17:57

I'm sure you are a nice person! Other people sharing their opinion on what you should be doing is not helpful at the best of times, never mind when you're hormonal and tired, try and ignore them. I suppose they probably think they're being helpful or not really thinking at all. ((()))
Mummy to my little Christmas pudding, Moo, December 2012 and a summer pudding, baby E born June 2015
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Re: Feeling overwhelmed

Postby Treeb » 17 Apr 2015, 18:19

((((((t&n's mummy))))))

I was feeling exactly like this just a couple weeks ago. Dh had a few weeks in a row of very long work days and having to work saturdays ... he was home at night, but essentially we only saw him very briefly in the mornings and evenings and then had Sundays together. It is so hard solo parenting and trying to keep up with everything when you are already sore and exhausted just from living. And I only have one, so I can't imagine how much harder it feels to keep up with two!

Just ignore the people who are giving you advice that doesn't fit your style. Most likely they are just trying to help in their own way, but everything can feel so negative when we're already feeling down and worn out, sometimes you just need to block it out and not worry about it. Is there anyone you can reach out to for a little help, either with some of the cleaning/cooking/whatever or with keeping t&n busy long enough for you to get a rest or just some quiet cleaning time? I definitely let a lot of the cleaning and such slide when dh is busy because it just becomes too much, but getting help with it would be even better.

It is tough right now for all of you, but just do what you need to to get through it and things will get better!
Mama to big boy L born Sept. 2012, and baby girl A born June 2015.

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Re: Feeling overwhelmed

Postby Cofa's Tree » 17 Apr 2015, 19:58

I only know you a little bit but you are a nice person! Block out anything you don't want to hear and deal with the whys when you are able to.

Can you do something fun as a family tomorrow to bring you all back together? Build a den in the park/garden/living room (with you sitting down supervising, of course!) and have a picnic in it?
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Re: Feeling overwhelmed

Postby mindy » 17 Apr 2015, 21:59

It is so hard being pregnant, and you were feeling hormonal and tearful anyway - no wonder you are overwhelmed after being home alone and insensitive people sticking their beaks in. Totally sympathise, it WILL pass, T&N won't remember and will 100% forgive you as soon as you feel up to a nice afternoon with them - which you will v soon. Big hugs, remember what an amazing (and exhausting) thing your body is doing xx
Two adorable, headstrong daughters: Roo born Sept 2008, Min born April 2011, and small boy who arrived Summer 2015
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Re: Feeling overwhelmed

Postby Lily » 18 Apr 2015, 14:01

((())) you have every right to feel overwhelmed. I think I know what you mean about weekends - I always seem to build them up in my head and look forward to them, like I did pre-kids, but I'm just setting myself up to be disappointed because of course there's still all the normal childcare to do, plus DH wants to relax and do his own thing after a long week at work, so I'm resentful that he's not helping me enough. Add in feeling obliged to do fun, weekendy things and it just puts too much pressure on.

Soon you will be through the pregnancy and have a lovely squish (who you can put down or hand over to someone else now and again...).
Izbiz, May 2012
Bee, April 2015
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Re: Feeling overwhelmed

Postby mindy » 19 Apr 2015, 11:49

Lily wrote: I think I know what you mean about weekends - I always seem to build them up in my head and look forward to them, like I did pre-kids, but I'm just setting myself up to be disappointed because of course there's still all the normal childcare to do, plus DH wants to relax and do his own thing after a long week at work, so I'm resentful that he's not helping me enough. Add in feeling obliged to do fun, weekendy things and it just puts too much pressure on.


This, to the word. Having just dried my tears for exactly the same reason (home alone AGAIN, crippled with PGD pain after doing nothing more than feeding and bathing girls, house in filthy chaos) - have had a stern word with myself about unrealistic expectations. WAAAAHH!!! Sorry T&N, that was no help, other than it may be a comfort to know you are not alone! Hugs to us all x x
Two adorable, headstrong daughters: Roo born Sept 2008, Min born April 2011, and small boy who arrived Summer 2015
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Re: Feeling overwhelmed

Postby t&n's mummy » 19 Apr 2015, 12:52

Oh no mindy, hope you are ok? Thank you all, yes it does help to know it's not just me and prob is more to do with pg hormones than anything else. I don't feel so lonely now anyway.
Mummy to T dec 09 and N Mar 12
One little angel (6w) apr 11
http://www.facebook.com/Mariamadeit or see what we get up to at http://mariamadeit.wordpress.com
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Re: Feeling overwhelmed

Postby mindy » 19 Apr 2015, 14:22

We can start a hormonal Weepy Women Club! Pesky hormones.....
Two adorable, headstrong daughters: Roo born Sept 2008, Min born April 2011, and small boy who arrived Summer 2015
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Re: Feeling overwhelmed

Postby Michaelcoleman » 23 Jan 2016, 10:17

I have some advice here. Every time you should be present and don t think about bad. Every time you should be more positive. Be keep good thinking. Try to interact more with people.
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